Damn I hate Downward Dog. If it was an actual dog, I would put it down. Every time the yoga instructor indicates that it’s time to transition into this position, I want to euthanize myself. Whatever sadist thought of this shoulder-grinding aberration of bodily positioning was a sick dog, and deserved to get Old-Yellered with extreme prejudice. The fact that
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Mary Ann and I bought our house in North Portland nearly five years ago. While I was excited about the diversity of folks living in NoPo, and we both dug the proximity to our jobs at the time, truth is it was all about the Benjamins. This was one of the few places two firmly middle-class folks could still afford
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“You gotta know when to boule them/ Know when to school them/ Know when to play a card/ Know when to flail. You never trade your token/ Unless you’re in the Viper Pass/ There’ll be time enough for cackling, once the ship has sailed.” – “The Gambler” by Kenny Rogers (in an alternate dimension where Fireball Island, aka Ile Boule
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As far back as I can remember, I’ve always wanted to have a water feature. Or at least as far back as an afternoon spent playing at my grade school buddy Adam Carpenter’s house, which was adorned with a small pond and waterfall in the back left corner. The very term “water feature” is wholly inadequate to describe the sense
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“Wet Hot American Summer” is my “Rocky Horror Picture Show.” Well, it is, but see if you can follow me here. It … isn’t. Unlike acolytes of the “Rocky Horror Picture Show,” I would never pay good money to sit in a theater at midnight and listen to the loudest, tooliest “Wet Hot American Summer” fans in the room drown
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“Dark Shadows” looms over the house near the bluffs in CollinsPortland, and only one man perceives the significance of this Gothic soap opera as it pertains to a strange and momentous period in his life. Recently released from a secret prison inside the CollinsPortland Cannery Association, this media assassin for hire now contemplates his new-found freedom and potential next steps.
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